A beautiful life!

Now let's talk about the lessons from The

7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey.


There is the so-called maturity continuum.

It is the development of a person from being

dependent, independent, and interdependent.

Dependence is the period from the day we were

born and we depend on our parents

to take care of us.

In the meantime, independence is when

we can already decide for ourselves.

Interdependence is when we are to

collaborate with others to achieve a

thing which we could not get by ourselves.

The first three habits focus on self-mastery

and movement from dependence

towards independence.

Habits 4, 5, 6 in turn

stress interdependence.

The final habit, the seventh,

is about continual imporovement.

Let's discuss these habits.


There are two types of problems

that we face in life.

First are the problems where you can do something

to reduce or solve it.

This is your Circle of Influence.

This includes your way of spending, exercise

habits, choosing friends,

time management, or clothing.

The second are problems that you lack

control. This is the Circle of Concern.

Located inside the Circle of Concern are

problems that we have no control over, such as

gas prices, other people's opinions,

raining, natural disasters, wars, weapons,

and terrorist threats, or lovelife of celebrities.

Being proactive means

taking responsibilities in our lives.

Proactive people focus on issues

within their Circle of Influence.

They use their time and energy

to further increase their Circle of Influence.

For example, during lockdown,

you can use the time

to develop new skills.

Because you can do nothing about the

concerns outside your Circle

of Influence, don't worry about them anymore.

Let us not complain about issues that we could not

control so our time and energy would not be wasted.


It means to think about

how you want to complete something

before you begin.

Simple example is every time you look for a

recipe before you cook, every time you look at Google

maps before you take a road trip, and every time you look at the back or

behind the box of jigsaw puzzles before building it.

It should be clear in your mind now of the

big picture of what you want

to happen in your life. Do you want to be a

doctor? CPA? Nurse? Engineer? Architect?

Let's assume, what would others say and think

about you when you have accomplished

your journey in the world and they would attend your wake?

What person do you want them to see in you?

What achievements and contributions

do you want them to remember?

The things that you want them to remember about

you are your core values so ​​from now on,

you need to focus and work hard

on those values.

You need to develop a personal mission statement

It becomes your basis in making

decisions every day.

It's a great way for you to get to know

yourself better and where you are going.

It should now be clear

in your mind a big picture

what you want to happen in your life.

Think of what you want to do in the future

and decide which direction you will take in your

life to ensure that every step is taken

in the good and the right direction.


In Habit 2, we discuss the importance of

defining values ​​and understanding

on what we set out to achieve.

Habit 3 is about adherence

to these goals and the practice of

doing daily activities related to your priorities.

First things first - easy to hear,

it's hard to stand up.

For example, many students today

prioritize playing and checking their

social media accounts instead of studying

for their quizzes tomorrow.

Imagine you have a pile of sand,

a pile of rocks, and a box

where you should put

the same heaps

If you put sand first before the

rocks, it's possible that all would

not fit in the box.

However, if the rocks are loaded first

before the sand, they all would fit in the box.

The spaces between the big rocks would be filled

by the sand.

Your life is like a box.

You need to prioritize

what you need to do first.

We can say that the sand represents

the non-essentials while the

large rocks are the most important

events in your life.

The tasks can be classified into two:

1) urgent and 2) important.

Let's look at the time management matrix:

There are four quadrants that draw our attention.

In quadrant 1 is important and urgent.

In quadrant 2, the important but not the urgent.

In quadrant 3 is not important but urgent.

In quadrant 4 is not important and not urgent.

An activity is important if it is

contributing to your medium and long term goals.

Another activity is urgent

when it requires immediate attention.

When habits 1 and 2 are developed, more

attention will be give to quadrant 2.

Some examples of quadrant 2 activities

include the building of relationships,

long term planning, exercise,

personal growth, recreation, and preventive activities.

To focus on quadrant 2,

your priorities need to be clear to you.

Second, you must learn to reject

activities that have no value at all

in the fulfillment of your goals.

With so many distractions so far,

our attention is drawn to quadrants 3 and 4.

An example of quadrant 4 activity

is watching shows that don't have any

added value for your goals.

An example of quadrant 3 is attendance

to seminars that are not related

to the competences you want to develop.

In giving time to doing these activities,

your time in doing activities

under quadrant 2 is reduced.

Soon, the former activity which is not urgent

would become urgent.

For example, because you didn't complete

a report on time, you need to spend sleepless nights for

three days just to finish it

because your boss is looking for it.

Avoid activities in quadrants 3 and 4.

Included in the management of activities

under quadrant 1 is granting

enough attention for activities

under quadrant 2.


There are six models of human interaction.

This is the:

(1) Win / Win - Both person win.

Agreements or solutions are mutually

helpful and enjoyable to both parties.

(2) Win / Lose - "If I win, you lose."

People in Win / Lose situations are often tempted in

using positions, power, credentials,

and personality to get what they want.

(3) Lose / Win - “I'll win, you win.

"People here respond to requests easily

and search for strength

from acceptance and popularity.

(4) Lose / Lose - Both lose.

When two Win / Lose persons are

together - that is, when two are determined,

stubborn, ego-driven,

become connected - the result will be Lose / Lose.

(5) Win - People with Win mentality

does not mean they want others not to

get what they want.

What matters to them is to get what they want.

And finally, number 6, No Deal.

If you can't reach an

agreement that is mutually beneficial to both

parties, no deal has taken place.

An example of win-win is when you want

the chips and your husband likes adobo (a Filipino dish)

so he exchanged his chips

for your adobo.

The best choice is to create

Win-Win situations.

In Win-Lose, or Lose-Win, only one person

gets what he wants, but the results

will negatively affect the relationship

between those two people.

The Win-Win or No Deal option is important

to be used as a backup.

When No Deal is an option in our mind,

it frees us from the need of

manipulating people and pushing

to them our agenda.

In solving Win-Win, we need to consider

two factors: consideration and courage.

If we have high courage and high consideration,

there is a great potential for a

Win-Win situation.

If one of the two factors is low,

while one is high, it could

result in Win-Lose or Lose-Win.

If both factors are low,

this would result in Lose-Lose.

"To go for Win-Win, you not only have

to be nice, you have to be courageous, ”

advised by Stephen Covey.

Another important note to create

Win-Win situations is the existence

of abundance mentality, or the belief that

“There's plenty out there for everyone.”

Most people have

scarcity mentality. They have a hard time

sharing recognition or credit

and they find it hard to be genuinely happy

in the success of other people.

If we are to be genuine, there is higher

level of proactivity, higher

commitment to Win-Win;

our influence is stronger.

In Win-Win, keep the focus on results, not methods;

on problems, not people.



According to Dr Covey, the ability

to communicate effectively is

the most important life skill.

This can only be done by listening to and understanding

what other people want to convey to us.

It's very easy to give an opinion on anything.

It's very easy to judge or criticize.

But the basis of our opinion just comes from

from our perspective and the data we have.

The usual thing which happens is something

is equally visible to two people.

Because of the differences in their perspective,

different stand or positions could be reached

If we avoid giving our take or position

regarding an issue until we do not understand

the whole story and the reason for the decision

or the perspective of those whom we talk to,

our relationships will improve

with the people around us.

Saying something that we will

eventually regret in the future will likewise be avoided.

As such, it will protect our credibility.

Understanding what people are talking about first

also shows that we possess high level of

emotional intelligence or the ability to understand

underlying emotions

and give appropriate reaction.

Possession of this habit will increase

your influence on many people.

They would prefer talking to you.

Your words will also be more valuable.

These are especially important in the field

of leadership, sales and business.


The meaning of synergy is two or more

things that work together to create

something bigger

or greater than the sum of their

individual efforts.

Different people will bring different

opinions, ideas, perspectives, strengths, and more.

Instead of just tolerating and accepting

the differences, why don't we celebrate them?

For example, if you plant two

plants together, their roots

will mix, blend, and improve

the quality of the soil, so that both plants

would grow better than they would have grown


It's just like the concept of a broom.

You can't clean well

if you only use a piece of the broom.

You should tie/knot the pieces

to be progressive in cleaning.

This is no different with the

Filipino concept of "bayanihan" or helping each other.

By Synergy, 1 + 1 is

not only 2, it can be 3, 10, 50, 100!

So how do we introduce synergy

in a given situation or environment?

Start with habits 4 and 5.

You have to think Win-Win

and seek first to understand.

When you have them in mind, you are not in the

opposite side of the problem - you are in the same

side, looking at the problem, understanding

the needs, and working

to create a third alternative

that can address problems.

Again, habits 4-6 emphasize relationships.

This will help you achieve

the interdependent relationship with other people.



This habit is for the care and improvement of

the capacity of our most valuable asset,


Continuous improvement should be covered

in four areas of our lives.

These include physical, social / emotional,

mental, and spiritual dimensions.

Some examples for the improvement

of our physical dimension consist of eating well,

adequate rest, and regular exercise.

Included in the spiritual dimension: the practice

of meditation, interaction with nature

or listening to good music.

These help with our mental improvement -

reading notable books,

watching MOBAZILLA, and having a journal

of your thoughts, experiences, and insights.

Just watch for those that enrich our life and the mind.

Making contributions to projects that

improve the lives of others helps

develop social or emotional dimensions.

These activities should be the content

of your quadrant 2 as discussed in

our time management matrix.

The balanced development of

the four aspects of your life allows

you to continue doing the first six habits.

You will increase your ability to cope with

the challenges that will come into your life.

Ignoring this habit will result

to weakness of your body,

becoming insensitive to others,

or existence of insecurities.

By now, you already know the 7 habits

of highly effective people.

These include the following.

NUMBER 1. Be Proactive.

2. Begin with the End in Mind

3. Put First Things First

4. Think Win-Win

5. Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood

6. Synergize

And, 7. Sharpen the Saw


Until then!